Monday, April 26, 2010


I have to get something off my mind.  

Some of you may find this very hard to believe and some of you may be nodding your head agreeing really loudly as I tell you this.  I'm probably the most pessimistic person you'll ever meet.  I honestly try so hard every day to see the good, the great, the amazing things that are happening in my life. I don't know why it's so hard for me... 
I'm so exhausted feeling this way.  

There have been some tears lately as I'm trying to figure 'me' out. Somedays I make it WAY worse and somedays I feel happy just being me, not relying on anybody or anything.  It's really hard for me to just be me.  I don't like to do ANYTHING by myself...which I highly blame on being a twin.  Maybe that's partly why I don't really know myself.  I've always had someone by my side. I didn't need to be just 'me' was always 'us'   

Anyways, I'm starting my journey of happiness. I want to be happy, adventurous, out going and shout from the roof tops.  

I'm not ready to shout anything today...but I was walking down the hall the other day and one of our para professionals (who is 83 years old) stopped me and told me I looked beautiful, so alive, and happy.  I almost gave her a hug.  It was like she knew I needed to hear those words.  With my eyes watering as I continued to walk I realized that I was happy. My students had walked down the hallway perfectly and it smelled like rain outside.  

It truly is the little things...

1 comment :

  1. Life is a journey of figuring out who we are. Writing in a journal each day about those (maybe 2-3) things that make you happy or that your are grateful for has always helped me remember the many blessings that surround me each day. Try it. Then on days when you are feeling down you can look back and be grateful all over again.