Saturday, February 28, 2015

life lately

I can't believe February is already over...I blinked and it was gone.  This past week we've been snuggled up inside enjoying real winter days.  One of my 4th grade students invited us to her last basketball game of the season so I took Everdeen to her first game last weekend.  I smiled as I remembered playing basketball, awkwardly, in 4th grade too.  I was the girl who was dribbling the wrong direction after half time...Everdeen clapped whenever a basket was made (even if it was for the opposing team)  Hey! We're all winners! At least in the eyes of a two and a half year old. 

School has been a bit challenging these last few weeks.  Preparing for our state assessments, difficult behaviors, and spring break fever don't mix so well. I've taken it upon myself to instill kindness in all 27 of my students even if I have to force it down their throats. Just kidding...sort of;) We start our morning singing and waving hello, welcoming all of our classmates back to school. We stand up and give out warm fuzzies to our friends who have warmed our hearts.  We read quotes about changing the world and watch videos of kindness that make us cry. It really has been amazing watching these 10 year olds respond to wanting to do good in this world. The other morning we finally filled up our jar with warm fuzzies and decided on an act of kindness we could do as a class- they chose to create beautiful letters for their classmate who is undergoing chemotherapy. I wanted to give each of them a giant hug, I felt so proud of them.  But then it's recess and suddenly everything goes out the window. There are mean looks, whispers, and body language that hurts and screams so loudly. So I take a deep breath and we start again. They'll get it...even if it's not until they become an adult. They'll someday get it. 

Nine days until glorious Spring Break! I can hardly wait! 

Saturday, February 14, 2015

A Valentine's Day Walk

I think we found a new favorite spot for family hikes. I especially can't wait to go back this summer.  It was nice to be able to spend some family time together on this warm Valentine's Day.  We have been enjoying our very mild winter here, but I know it's confusing for the trees and plants.  We saw signs of spring on our walk...little tiny blades of grass, new and green, starting to poke up from the earth.  We tried to tell them that spring is still a month away, but I don't blame them for enjoying the warm sunshine too.

Martin is busy in the kitchen as I type, preparing our family Valentine feast.  We're indulging tonight. When we were in college I began a tradition of cooking Martin dinner on Valentine's Day. Spaghetti with pesto and cherry pie for dessert (mostly because those were two of the only things I knew how to make).  Well, my very sweet chef husband has adjusted the recipes so that we can still enjoy our traditional dinner...spaghetti squash with pesto and gluten free cupcakes filled with cherries.  Not quite the same, but I'll take it!
Hope everyone is enjoying a relaxing weekend surrounded by those you love the most! 

Thursday, February 12, 2015

little valentines

I left school yesterday as soon as the bell rang so Everdeen and I could spend the afternoon preparing her little Valentines for her friends at daycare. She peeled, I chopped, and we put the colorful pieces of crayons into a silicone tray.  I popped them into the oven at 230 degrees for about 20 minutes and Voila! The perfect little Valentine gift for her two year old friends.  I was pretty much feeling like mom of the year as I cut and wrote out the messages on each of the cards.  Then when I went to pick up Everdeen from school today I noticed that all of the kids' Valentine bags were filled to the wait what!?  Yeah I was that parent. I've been on the other end of this moment so many with a panicked look in their eyes. "Mrs. Wolfe! I forgot my Valentines!" 

I sheepishly asked her teachers if I could still bring her Valentine's tomorrow and they sympathetically looked at me and said, "Of course! Another parent forgot too!"  Good, at least I'm not the only one. Sigh...someday I'll get this motherhood thing down. 

Friday, February 6, 2015

{5/52} {6/52}

"a portrait of my daughter, once a week, every week, in 2015."

Everdeen Kate: You were so tired you didn't even make it upstairs for your afternoon nap.   

"a portrait of my daughter, once a week, every week, in 2015."

Everdeen Kate: Exploring new places 

 Linking up with Jodi :)

Monday, February 2, 2015

Love Your Curls | Learning to Love Me

Before Everdeen was born, I had a very vivid dream of what she would look like. I remember a little girl being held up with blue eyes and blond curly hair.  That was my girl...I knew that would be her. And it was. 

Everdeen's hair is growing very very slowly, but it is as cute and curly as can be.  I can't tell you how many people will comment about her hair and then end with, "Oh, she's really going to hate her hair when she's older!"  Knowing what it's like to have hair that you have to straighten everyday if you want it to resemble any of today's hottest styles, I always laughed and agreed.  "I know!  We always want what we don't have!"  

Thinking back on those conversations makes me cringe after seeing this commercial.  Leave it to Dove to make me cry over a silly commercial, but the message sunk in hard.  What is Everdeen going to think when she sees her mama straightening her hair everyday...that I don't appreciate and love what I have and that she shouldn't either.  I don't want my daughter to not love her curls and I don't want her to ever think that the hair she has been blessed with isn't good enough. When did society decide that what we were born with wasn't acceptable?  I will never have beautiful flowing mermaid hair and that has to be okay! So I made a decision that most days my hair will be worn a la natural.  

I walked into school yesterday feeling very uncomfortable...feeling my stupid anxiety creep up and my insecurities overpowering my brain. "I should have just straightened my hair...I look like a lion." Everyone was gong to stare and comment.  Finally in my classroom, alone, I pulled myself together and took a deep breath. I was being ridiculous.  I never ever wanted Everdeen to feel this way.  I need to learn to love myself so that my daughter will learn to love herself. 

There were lots of comments yesterday and they were all so complimentary...except for one. As I opened the door to let my students in one of the little boys screamed, "WOA! Did you stick your finger in the electrical socket?!" Let's just say he got a very stern warning about manners... I wore my hair natural again today and I barely even thought about it...and you know what? It felt good to be me and to be okay with me.  I feel like I am working on so many things in my life right now and maybe this 'thing' feels not so significant...maybe even a little vain, but every bit of me that I can accept will allow me to accept the whole me.  Plus, it took me half the time to do my hair this morning which is a humongous win.