Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Can I Be Honest?

(I honestly don't like the taste of chicken...even if my amazingly wonderful husband roasted it with love to a golden crispiness...I wish I could say that I did)

I started blogging as a way to document my life.
I've kept a journal since 4th grade and I love writing about 'me' and everything my life holds.  Sometimes though I don't write everything I want to say...I'm afraid my family will think I'm sharing too much with strangers.  But I think that that's almost the point of blogging.  To share our matter how personal they may be   

So here goes nothing...let the honesty begin. 

For the past 37 days I have thought that I could possibly be pregnant...or that I had some incurable disease.  I was sort of hoping it was the first. I have felt extreme fatigue, been really nauseous, dizzy. 

Just not myself.  

After a visit to my doctor, filling 4 tubes of blood, and all my test results coming back normal, I thought I would feel a sense of relief. I feel like I've told those I'm closest to what I thought were the right things to say, "Thank goodness everything worked out!" "It's probably a good thing that I'm not pregnant right now!"  

But if I can be truly honest, I was actually really disappointed that it didn't turn out to be a sweet baby.  I know I know, I can hear my family now telling me that it's not a good time.  And they're probably right...I hate that they're right. 

So I'll just pray that someday it will be the right time and when it is that we can welcome a sweet baby into the world. 

I like being honest.  
I feel so much better getting this all off my mind.
Now I'm ready to get back into blogging full swing...because life in kinderland has been super entertaining lately 


  1. I know the feeling. :-) I felt that way last year - like it wasn't a good time to be pregnant, but secretly I think it would have been exciting if I was! Then we actually started trying, and I had to wait almost a year before my body straightened out enough to get pregnant. My advice - it's never the "perfect time", so don't put it off waiting for that, because it will never come. But having a sweet baby is special no matter when they enter your life.
    I'll be praying that the Lord would grant you a little one in His perfect time!

  2. i am secretly hoping that I will be an auntie ;)

  3. Your time will come and you will be a fantastic mother! - almost as good as you are a fantastic teacher!

  4. :), I love how you started you entry with "I do not like the taste of chicken" and ended with honesty about your feelings, what a great what to pull us readers in.

    p.s. I am excited to hear more stories, I feel like this week has been extraordinarily long and I haven't really seen you. Oh, and after I tell you my wonderful story from today you'll be thankful you don't teach the older kids anymore!