Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Love Story {Part IV} Survival Mode

In the late fall of 2006, I opened my placement letter for student teaching. I had been placed in a city I had never wanted to go to and I was devastated. Those who know me well know that I am a homebody. Home is where I feel the safest. Looking back now though, I can see that maybe I needed to be pushed to expand my wings and try something new. I would never have left on my own accord.

I would be moving to our state's capitol, somewhere I had only been with my family for special occasions...when we visited the museum or the zoo. I had never in a million years pictured myself living amongst the hustle and bustle of big city life. I was scared to death and didn't know what these next six months were going to look like. 

But there was one bright light amongst all these gloomy thoughts.  My big sister, Elizabeth, was already living in Denver working towards her PhD, and without hesitation she had asked me to live with her. I was beyond relieved.

I remember saying goodbye to Martin. We stood outside his rundown apartment across from campus and he held me in his arms for what didn't seem like long enough.  The cold wind whipped around us and I thought it was fitting that everything around us was dead and covered in dirty snow. Through my tears he told me it wouldn't be so bad. He would come visit me as often as he could and I would do the same. I nodded and gave an unconvincing smile. I got in my overpacked car and couldn't look back as I drove away. 
As I made my first drive to my new home...I cried even more tears. It was almost a two our drive to see the love of my life and I knew we would both be very busy with school.

I slowly began to unpack my new life. I started my placement at a school in Aurora, a suburb of Denver.  The school was rough and I had been assigned to a 5th grade class of kids who were much taller than me, where the boys were already growing mustaches, and where I was told by the students that they didn't like me. I worked hard, proving myself to those around me that I could do this. I began to fit into a community where I was the minority and I began to earn the respect of my new class. 

When my school days were over I longed for the moment when I could see Martin. We made the two hour journey more times than we could count, through blizzards and rush hour traffic. Our two weekend days together would fly by too quickly. It wasn't enough time to catch up on what we were missing. Some weekends we couldn't see each other at all.  Some weekends we spent arguing about things that didn't matter. But we continued to talk daily and continued to make the best of what we had.
When Spring came I felt like I had literally survived a battle and I was waking up with the sun. Somehow I made it through my placement with only a few emotional scars and much thicker skin. I was more ready than ever to take on my own classroom.  I was excited about my future. I applied to hundreds of jobs...mostly back home where I desperately wanted to return to. 
Martin still had a year and half of school left after switching majors and my number one goal was to move closer to where he was.


  1. best roomie ever!! ~Elizabeth

  2. It's interesting to look back and see God's plan.