The Bread I Shall Not Eat

There lies the bread.  Glazed in warm butter with a side of cinnamon butter.

I think the rolls were secretly laughing at me...

I've been struggling lately with trying to eat clean...being true to Paleo.  This past month has been stressful and busy and as a result I grab for things that are easy to eat, but not necessarily what my body needs.  I can tell such a difference in how I feel.  I'm nauseous again, I'm tired.  And on top of it all I got a mean ulcer...not fun. But I'm at it again, trying my best, healing my body once again.

It's amazing what I'll tell myself so I don't feel bad about eating things I can't, "It's okay if you eat that piece of bread Jessica, you'll probably feel sick afterwards, but it's SO WORTH IT!"

Then I do feel sick and I kick myself for my decision. 

Since I've cut gluten out of my diet I feel like my body is even more sensitive to it and I can really feel when it is in my system.  I'm still learning every day...it's a mental obstacle more than anything for me. If it wasn't for my husband I don't know what I would do.  He encourages me everyday, telling me I can do it. He's my biggest role model.

. . .

I stared at those buttered rolls for a long time...I even thought about stuffing a whole one in my mouth while Martin went to the bathroom. But I mustered up my self control, ordered my chicken, and even ignored the croutons in my salad. It may seem insignificant, but small victories like this make me feel like I can do it again tomorrow.

My body thanks me.