Life Lately

My Christmas tree is sparkling and the candles in the windows are glowing.  Last night, Everdeen asked if we could keep her little tree lit as she fell asleep.  I remembered falling asleep when I was little with the Christmas candles in my window casting a warm glow across my room.  I would sneak into my twin sister's bed and we would stare at the lights on the houses across the street. I always felt so safe and cozy and it felt exactly the same in her room last night. I had to sneak in after she had fallen asleep to unplug her tree, but before I did, I re-tucked her in under her new quilt from Nana and kissed her goodnight. We took down her crib a couple of weeks ago (which was a bit of a heart wrenching moment for my mama heart...because of course she would have slept in her crib until college if I'd had my say) But she is much warmer snuggled under her flannel sheets and favorite blankets.

These past few weeks have stretched us with our little tots tantrums(I'm so sorry you can't play with the needle nosed pliers...) yet at the same time she has overwhelmingly filled our hearts with joy. Today, as I carried Everdeen down the stairs she stroked my hair, gave it a kiss, and told me, "Mama, I want you forever." It's amazing to watch this little person with independent thoughts and wants...sometimes very independent thoughts and wants. It still amazes me daily that I am the mother of a two year old. A two year old who is sweet, loving, and fills our home with joyful giggles. 

I am so excited to create a magical Christmas season for Everdeen this year. She's been asking "What you doing Mama?" as I prepare our home for the holiday. I love telling her about our traditions and watching her eyes sparkle as she's now old enough to understand. I still vividly remember rocking her to sleep when she was about five months old. The Christmas tree filled our tiny one bedroom apartment with its soft and familiar glow and I sang Silent Night over and over until her breathing was steady. I knew she couldn't comprehend what Christmas was all about, but I knew she could feel the magic.